Goodness Weekly 8.18.25
“Listening is where love begins: listening to ourselves and then to our neighbors.”
- Fred Rogers
WHAT’S GOOD
We're Becoming Sunset Ridge Church
After a season of prayerful reflection, congregational feedback, and discernment, we’re excited to share that our church is adopting a new name:
Sunset Ridge Church, a Christ-centered community.
This new name reflects who we are and who we’re becoming—a welcoming, Christ-rooted community committed to welcome, hospitality, belonging, and spiritual formation.
We look forward to sharing more in the coming weeks as we begin this next chapter together. Thank you for your input, your prayers, and we look forward to what God has ahead for our community.
Into You I See
Jess Lowry, Executive Director, Sunset Ridge Collective
This is Part 2 of a 5-part series based on an interview with Licensed Professional Counselor & Supervisor Grace Iacuone. In our conversation, Grace shared research, stories, and practical tips for navigating change, building connection, and caring for our mental and emotional health. Each week, we’re exploring one theme from that conversation, with ideas you can use in your everyday life.
Part 2 — Into You I See
When someone tells us, “You’ll be fine!” but we don’t feel fine, something inside us tenses up. Grace explained that this disconnect is called incongruence—when what we feel and what others reflect back don’t match, and our nervous system instantly notices. Without alignment, safety is disrupted.
Our youngest, Shiloh, started a new school this year. In bed the first night, she cried and told me she missed her old school, her old friends, and that things would never be the same. Her heart was broken. Because of what Grace had shared the week prior, I knew to resist the urge to sugarcoat this or flood her with high-energy reasons that everything would be great. Instead, I told her she was right — things wouldn’t be the same now — and that I understood a large part of her was very sad. Then I asked if there might be any small part that was excited about the new friend she’d told me about earlier. She paused and said, “Yes, a little tiny part feels excited.”
Without the awareness of incongruence and speaking in parts, I would have done what I typically do — name the feeling but follow it quickly with encouragement to try to help. Many of us do this, and it’s not that it’s wrong. But if it’s ever happened to you, you know the feeling of not being fully seen and understood.
This is where connection lies — in fully witnessing someone’s truth before rushing to reassure.. It’s summarized beautifully by theatre teacher Martin de Maat, who said, “You know what intimacy is? It’s into-me-you-see... it’s allowing someone to know who you are when you have all these defenses to keep them from knowing.”
Grace also connected this to a practice from Internal Family Systems therapy called speaking in parts. Instead of forcing ourselves—or others—into one emotion, we can name and honor the different “parts” we feel:
“Part of me is excited for this new opportunity, and part of me is anxious.”
“Part of me wants to meet new people, and part of me feels shy.”
When we speak in parts, we make space for our full humanity and send the message: All of you belongs here. This not only builds self-compassion but also deepens trust in relationships, because we’re meeting each other with honesty and openness.
This week’s practice:
When someone shares how they’re feeling, pause before offering reassurance. Name what you notice and, if it fits, invite “parts language” into the conversation. It may be the key that opens a deeper level of safety and connection.
Love, Jess
This Week
Wednesdays, 11 AM - 1:30 PM, Open Studio Painting
Thursdays, 7:30 PM - 8:30 PM, Community Fitness with Lauren, Charis Park
Saturdays, Sunset Ridge Farmers Market, Charis Park
Sundays, Worship at 9 AM and 11 AM
Event Rentals - Interested in hosting your event at Charis Park or in our facilities? We are currently booking for 2025–please email rentals@sunset-ridge.org
Community Partners: For updated schedules and events please follow One Another Coffee, Sunset Ridge Farmers Market, NYX Wellness, Scott’s Pizza, Mission Compost, Sprouts School, Good Acres, and Community First Food Pantry.
Inhale: When I feel the urge to jump in and fix a hard thing for someone else
Exhale: Help me to be still and be present instead
